Figured Out
by kaylee-bella
Summary: Bella and Edward have been dating for 7 years and then all of a sudden, it's over. Bella is devastated and tries to move on. A chance encounter 3 years later leaves Bella with something she never wanted or expected, just when she had life figured out.
1. Preface

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I only play with them. Playing with Edward. Well that sounds pretty hot.

Author note: This is my first multi-chapter story and I would love any comments or notes even if they are bad. It would really help me. I know this is short but I am writing the next as you read this.

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Preface

How did it end up like this? I had my life all figured out and now, well now I'm fucked.


	2. Planned Out

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or Edward. If I owned him I would not be writing this. I would be locked in my room with him and I would never come out again.

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BPOV

I had known Edward Cullen, the love of my life since I was thirteen years old. He was my first date, first boyfriend, first kiss and first fuck. We had experienced everything together. We had been in Dartmouth for two years together and were basically living together. I had my own apartment and he lived in the dorms. That night I was going to ask him to move in with me officially. I had it all planned out. I had gone to the spa the day before and had everything waxed. I bought new lingerie that morning, its midnight blue lacy and easy to remove because at the end of the day that's what it's for. I have also been cooking for hours trying to make everything perfect. Well he's due in an hour I have to start getting ready, I can't wait for our first fuck of us living together, mind-blowing ladies. Simply mind-blowing.

EPOV

I was on the way over Bella's apparently there is something important she wants to ask me. I had hoped that she would ask me to do her up the ass. We hadn't done that yet and my friends had said that it's awesome. I had even brought flowers to butter her up with. As I walked into her apartment the first thing I noticed was that smell. In-fucking-credible. The second thing is that my girlfriend looked fuck-hot tonight. She definitely has something special in mind for tonight not our normal shad-fest. Which were pretty good if I do say so myself.

I walked up to her as she was stirring whatever it was that she was making and put my arms around. She smelled so good, like strawberries and sex. I dropped a kiss on her neck where I knew she was extra sensitive. She liked that shit and anything I could do to help whatever naughtiness she had planned was fine by me.

BPOV

God, he was so hot. Feeling him wrapped around me like that, well let's just say that it was triggering some memories of him being wrapped around with no clothes between us. I was getting so turned on and we hadn't even had dinner yet. No. Be strong Bella just get through dinner and then you can fuck his brains out. I turned around and kissed him full on his luscious and talented mouth. "Hi baby" I said. Calling him baby is like me squeezing his balls. He knows I'm horny. I turned back around and busied myself with serving the food.

Once we both sat down and had a plate of spaghetti each, I looked over at him. He looks like he fit there sitting opposite me in my kitchen. We made small talk while we ate, about what we did that day, that kind of thing. I poured us both a glass of wine and we sat on my sofa.

"Edward there is something really important I need to ask you" I started.

"Anything, my love" he replied.

"Well we have been together a long time now and I think it is time we take the next step" as I said this I looked straight into his eyes. They were dark with lust. What the hell does he think I'm talking about?

"I'm up for anything you can think of my love"

"Well I think you should move in with me" and with that he froze. I waited another two minutes to see if he would say or do anything and when he didn't I continued. "I mean you're practically here all the time and most of your stuff is here. Also think of all the sex we can have if your here all the time" It was another three minutes before he spoke. Longest three minutes of my life.

"Bella I think we should talk"

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Author's note: I would like to know if you prefer long or short chapters. I prefer short but that's just me. So if you want longer ones let me know. Thanks for reading.


	3. New Life

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. If I did I would get paid for writing this shit. (Sigh) I wish.

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EPOV

Holy shit! This was about as far away from what I thought was going to happen as you can get. Here I was imagining all kinds of kinky shit and she goes and asks me to MOVE IN! I froze when she asked, for what felt like hours but was probably only a couple of minutes. So many thoughts rushed through my head. The main ones were: - Jesus fucking Christ. I'm not ready. It's too soon. She'll want to get married soon. She'll want to have kids soon. I want to fuck around before I settle down. I have to end it. Now reading those thoughts you may think I was a prick and you are right. An immature prick.

"Bella we need to talk" I said.

"What about honey? I mean we have been together 7 years. When I think about mu future it includes you Edward. I want to marry you and have kids with you-"

I'm not going to lie. Hearing her talk about the future scared the Jesus fuck out of me. We were only twenty. I wanted to party, get wasted and high and generally enjoy being young. I had to cut her off before I pissed my pants. The problem was I didn't plan what I was going to say so I blurted out the first thing I though off. "I want to fuck other people". Nice Cullen, real nice. I looked up at her and to my complete surprise she was fucking laughing.

"Of course you do" she said, full of mirth. "Well you know what I think that is an excellent idea"

"You do?" I asked cautiously.

"Yeah I mean, how do I know that you are the one for me if I haven't experienced anyone else right?"

"Yeah I suppose"

"And if you are the only one I ever fuck, how am I supposed to know if there isn't someone out there who can make me come harder and scream louder right?"

OK after hearing that I'll admit I felt like someone had ripped my heart out and run over it. I didn't want anyone else touching my Bella. But I guess I can't expect her to become a nun while sow my wild oats. "Yeah I guess you're right" I responded glumly.

"So this is a break up right? Because I am not into having an open relationship?" she asked.

"Yes. This is it"

"Well in that case, gather up all your shit and get the fuck out of my apartment please" she said sweetly.

With that she walked out. "Well that went fantastically" I thought. For the next three hours I got together anything that was mine in our – shit I mean her apartment. I guess I had considered it ours for a while but the thought of officially moving in was enough to shrivel my balls.

I wanted to wait for her to come back. I wanted to say goodbye before I went back to the dorm where I am supposed to reside. She did eventually come home three hours after she left. She was absolutely shit-faced.

"Eddie your still here" she exclaimed.

"Yeah I just wanted to say bye"

"Well toodle-oo motherfucker"

"Are you going to be ok on your own Bella?"

"I'm not on my own silly Mike is here. He is paying the cab"

Just then some blonde guy walks in and puts his arm around MY Bella.

"Hi Eddie was it?" he asks.

"Edward actually"

"Oh you're the guy who dumped Bella. You lost yourself a real fire-cracker there man."

"Eddie you better get going cause I'm tired from the dancing, drunk from the drinks and horny from the grinding. And that my fried is not good. Not good at all. Well nighty-night."

With those final words she skipped, yes skipped to our – shit her bedroom and closed the door. The click of the door resounded the quiet apartment and it felt like a bullet to my heart. I ignored the blonde douche on my way out. I started walking towards my cramped, smelly dorm and towards my new life.

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Author's not: Next chapter is going to be Bella's POV of this. We'll find out about her weird reaction to the break-up and her drunken night out. Thanks for reading.


	4. Gay Old Time

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or Edward. Except maybe in my head I own him but then it is in a totally different way. ;)

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BPOV

"Bella we need to talk" he said.

"What about honey? I mean we have been together 7 years. When I think about mu future it includes you Edward. I want to marry you and have kids with you-" I didn't even get to finish my sentence when he cut me off with the sentence that would forever sentence him to being an asshole.

"I want to fuck other people". Oh my fucking God. Did he actually just say that? Even if that was what he was feeling he could have put it a bit more tactfully. I really wanted to cry and throw stuff and quite frankly cut off his cock so he couldn't fuck other people. Hang on. Other people. He didn't say other women. Oh my god. He's gay. That has to be it. With that thought I burst out laughing. It all makes sense. Why didn't I see the signs? He plays piano. He is so tidy. He has excellent dress sense and the biggest clue, for months he has been asking to do me up the ass. I didn't see the attraction until now.

"Of course you do" I said, my voice filled with amusement. "Well you know what I think that is an excellent idea."

"You do?" he asked slowly, perhaps he knows that I know.

"Yeah I mean, how do I know that you are the one for me if I haven't experienced anyone else right?" I asked hinting.

"Yeah I suppose" was that an admission? I don't know why he didn't just come right out and say it. Come out of the closet so to speak.

"And if you are the only one I ever fuck, how am I supposed to know if there isn't someone out there who can make me come harder and scream louder right?" Oh my god! He must have been picturing men while we were fucking. I think I'm going to throw up.

"Yeah I guess you're right" he admitted.

"So this is a break up right? Because I am not into having an open relationship?" I clarified. I am so I one guy at a time gal.

"Yes. This is it"

At this point I started having mental flashing images of him and other men. OK I really am going to throw up now. No woman should have to think about the man she loves bumming another man. It is just wrong. "Well in that case, gather up all your shit and get the fuck out of my apartment please" asked as sweetly as possible while fighting back the constant images and bile rising tomyr mouth. I couldn't take anymore so I walked out. What the fuck am I going to do now? I couldn't go see Alice, she's Edwards's sister. I couldn't go see Rose she is Edwards's brother's girlfriend. So I decided I was just going to go to the nearest bar on my own and get rat-assed.

I walked down the street to O'Reiley's. It's supposed to be Irish themed but the only differences I can tell from any other bar is the name and the cute Irish owner, Conner. I walked in and sat at the bar. I ordered two shots of Jaeger and a beer. I down the shots and then the beer within a couple of minutes. I ordered another round. This time I downed the shots and just drank the beer slower. Within an hour and a half I had drunk three rounds and was seeing double. I noticed a cute blonde sitting next to men. "Hi cutie. I'm Bella" I said as I stuck my hand out.

"Mike" he replied as he shook my hand.

After that we started with the usual small talk about our lives and childhoods. We danced for a while, well grinded but hey it got all the guys attention. Soon however I was telling him all about what happened to me earlier on that night.

"You have been together seven years and you didn't realise he was gay? He asked.

"Nope note a fucking clue" I slurred. "Mike let me ask you up front about this, just so there is no confusion because apparently my gay-dar seems to be broken. Are you gay?"

"Why, yes Bella, I am. I love me some cock"

"Good to know" After a couple of minutes of just listening to the music inspiration struck. "Mike I just had the best idea. I am going to set you up with Edward. You'll love him. He is hot and has a big cock. What more could you ask for?" After much protesting from Mike I managed to convince him to come back to my apartment so I could show him a picture and get him Edwards number if he liked what he saw.

Once we arrived at the apartment, I left Mike downstairs to pay the cab while I unlocked the door. Once I managed to get the key into the tiny, little hole I opened the door to see my very own bronze-haired fairy.

"Eddie your still here" I shouted excitedly. I could introduce them in person.

"Yeah I just wanted to say bye" Well if he doesn't want to meet Mike that's his loss.

"Well toodle-oo motherfucker"

Are you going to be ok on your own Bella?"

"I'm not on my own silly Mike is here. He is paying the cab"

I started to sway, how much had I drunk? Mike saved me from falling by wrapping one of his arms around my waist. "Hi Eddie was it?" Mike asked. He sounded like he thought something was funny.

"Edward actually"

"Oh you're the guy who dumped Bella. You lost yourself a real fire-cracker there man." I really needed to go to sleep my head was starting to spin.

"Eddie you better get going cause I'm tired from the dancing, drunk from the drinks and horny from the grinding. And that my fried is not good. Not good at all. Well nighty-night."

With these final parting words I went into my room to lie down. I knew I would have to deal with everything that happened tonight and mourn the loss of the love of my life but for now I was drunk and I kind of liked the numb feeling it provided.

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Author's note: If you have any comments, suggestions or ideas let me know. Thanks for reading.


	5. Not Quite Home

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Edward. Although Edward does own my fantasies.

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BPOV

It had now been three days since Edward left. Seventy two hours. Four thousand three hundred and twenty minutes. Two hundred and fifty nine thousand and 200 seconds. I felt every single second pass by with painful clarity. I hadn't done much since our "discussion". Just what I had to. I got up, ate breakfast, went to classes, ate dinner, did school work and went to bed. My friends had tried to talk to me about what happened but the wounds were too fresh without adding salt to them. On the fourth day I was getting set to repeat the pathetic routine which had turned into my life, when my saviour arrived, in the shape of a phone call. My mom was worried about me. I usually call her every week but I couldn't face her questions this week. As I listen to her prattle on about Phil (her young toy boy husband) getting signed to the Arizona Diamondbacks, I was formulating what I was going to say when she asked how Edward was and when she asked I didn't say my carefully prepared answer. No, of course not. I blurted out that I had found out Edward was gay. After the laughter had died down she asked me a question. A question that I thought had saved my life. Did I want to transfer to Phoenix College? Hell yeah I wanted to. I wanted to get away from the embarrassment that would surely follow when everyone found out. I wanted to get away from the pitying looks. I wanted to get away from him.

It took a week for the paperwork to go through and to pack up my apartment. I was lucky that in that time I didn't see Edward. I did however get a lot of visits from Alice, Rose, Emmett and Jasper. Of course they were all trying to change my mind and kept telling me what a dickhead Edward was and how I was too good for him. I couldn't tell them the real reason we broke up. I would let Edward tell them when he was ready. I still loved him and couldn't betray him like that. On the night before I was due to leave for Arizona and my new Edward free life, my friends decided to throw me a leaving party in my apartment. Of course I got plastered and emotional.

"I" sob "am" sob "going" sob "to" sob "miss" sob "you" sob "guys" I sniffled, trying hug my four friends at once.

"Awww we will miss you to Belly-bean" Emmet said.

"You've been my best friend and my sister for so long Bella. How will I cope when I won't see you every day?" Alice asked, unsuccessfully trying to hold back her tears.

"You'll come visit Alice, you all will and I'll come visit you"

"Ok" she relented clinging tightly to me.

After that we all needed another drink. And another. And another. Jessica Stanley, a girl from my English Lit class came over at some point. "So I heard you and Edward broke up" she said.

"Yeah we wanted different thing"

"Like?" she asked, now curious.

"Well he wants to fuck men and I don't want him to fuck men" I replied before passing out on one of the bean bags scattered through the room for the party

The next morning I woke up and my head felt like it was going to explode. After taking some Tylenol, I gathered my things and turned to look at my empty apartment. "Goodbye Edward" I said softly before closing the door on my apartment and old life. I got in Emmett's jeep with everyone and we headed to the airport. After many emotional goodbyes and promises to keep in touch and to see each other soon, I left.

After hours on the plane I finally landed in Phoenix. My mom and Phil were there to meet me and they drove me to my new apartment and helped me to get settled in . I forgot how much I missed my mother with her easy smile and contagious laugh. I liked Phil a lot and I could see myself getting along fine with him. Around midnight they left. I looked around at my new apartment. It didn't look like home yet and somehow I doubted it ever wood. Home was thousands of miles away. Home had piercing emerald eyes and bronze sex hair. My home would always be Edward.

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Author's note: Next chapter will be the last chapter before the three year jump, I think. Let me know if you have any comments, questions or suggestions. Thanks for reading.


	6. Home Is Where My Heart Is

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or Edward. Stephanie Meyer does, the lucky bitch.

Author's note I would like to dedicate this story to my awesome reviewers. Reading them is the highlight of my day.

auroraboralis

Ori1

rubyred753

Jan

brittany08forever

.twilight

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EPOV

I heard that Bella is leaving today. I had been avoiding her since the "discussion" we had. I didn't want to see her face and be reminded of cowardly behaviour. The truth is I was scared. I was scared that my whole life would have been planned out. We move in together, marry, have kids and grow old together. Don't get me wrong that sounded nice but it would have been what was expected. I love Bella with all my heart but I am just too young for my life to be mapped out already. I will admit that a little bit had to do with fucking other people but it was the scared thing as well. I wanted to go to the party my brother, sister, Rose and Jasper were throwing her but Emmett advised that I not go. I didn't see why I couldn't go, she seemed fine last time I saw her. In fact I think she was about to fuck a random stranger. I hadn't fucked anyone since we split. I had got offers and even made out with some of the girls but I just couldn't get into it. They weren't Bella. Of course I'll get over it. I am a man after all and men were designed to fuck.

She's really gone. I just ran into my friends. Rose and Alice couldn't talk from the tears that seem to choke their words. Even Emmett and Jasper looked a bit glassy eyed. We decided to head to a bar to drown our sorrows, as it were. I was on my fifth beer when a fake blonde with fake tits walked over to me. "Hi" she said. "You don't know me but I know you. You're Edward Cullen. I'm Jessica Stanley."

"Hello" I replied, not really in the mood to talk.

"So I heard you like cock now." It just so happens that I was taking a sip of beer when she said this which immediately sprayed everywhere in my shock.

"Excuse me" I managed to squeak out.

"Someone that knows you told me you like to bum guys now"

"I think you will find that you are mistaken"

"So it isn't true?"

"Um no"

"Well then I'm sorry to hear that because you might find it hard to pick up girls now as I told a few girls I know not to bother with you"

"Well I can assure you I like pussy. No I love pussy. You will have to tell everyone that you have told that you are mistaken."

"OK I'll try. Nice chatting to you Edward. I hope I'll see you real soon" she purred in my ear.

The rest of the gang came over to me once she had left. "What does that slut want?" Rose asked.

"Well apparently I'm gay now"

"Ha Ha. I always had a feeling Eddie. How many times did I ask you that when we were growing up?" Emmett laughed.

"Was it you that told her?" I asked seething.

"No, why the hell would I talk to her about you? In fact, why the hell would I talk to her period? You know Rose would cut my balls off if I talked to that slut."

"Well she said that someone that knows me told her I was gay. Any ideas guys?"

"It wasn't me"

"Or me"

"Or me"

"Or me"

"Fine I believe you. Let's just forget about this and drink. Oh but if anyone asks you please say I'm not. I really don't want this spread around college."

"Ok. Moving on, let's have a toast" said Alice handing each of us a shot glass. "To Bella"

"To Bella" we all said as we held our glasses up and then downed the shot. I don't remember anything else of night out or getting home. All I know is once I got to my dorm I climbed into bed and grabbed the picture on my nightstand. I stared at the picture until I fell asleep. The picture was of mm home. The picture was of my heart. The picture was of Bella.

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Author's note: I'm sorry it is short and kind of rushed but my little girl had been ill today and I haven't had much time to myself. I'll update tomorrow, it will be three years from now. If you have any comments, questions or suggestions let me know. Thanks for reading.


	7. Three years later

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters but if any of you know where I can purchase them let me know.

Author's note: I am so sorry I know I said I would update day's ago but my little girl has been ill and because my fiancé isn't here I went to stay with my mother, who is a complete technophobe and doesn't own a computer. I got back on the 29th but FF wouldn't let me upload this chapter. Sorry again ladies.

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BPOV

My 23rd Birthday had come and gone. I had graduated college first in my class. I have an amazing job I love. A hot boyfriend who worships me. Yet I still wasn't happy. The truth was I hadn't been happy for three years. I hadn't been happy since the night that Edward Cullen shattered my heart. I had tried to fill the void with meaningless sex and while it is satisfying it only lasts a moment before I felt empty again. So there I was Monday morning on my way to work thinking about the past and what could have been. As I arrived at work I wiped the depressing look off my face before my boss sees it. He knew that look all too well and refused to let me think of him. OK so you may be confused as to why my boss would care, well my boss is also my best friend. I am an assistant to Mike Newtown, editor at Eclipse Publishing house. Yes my boss and best friend happen to be the gay guy I picked up in a bar to fuck Edward. We met again a year ago . . .

I couldn't believe I was so nervous. It was just a job interview. OK it was a dream job and to even be asked for an interview when I was straight out of college was an honour but still, it was just a job. I had spent two hours that morning picking out a professional yet friendly outfit to wear and generally getting ready. I asked myself mock questions and answered them. I practiced my smile. I did everything I could to make sure I was as prepared as possible. Of course all that went flying out the fucking window as soon as I entered the building. I filled in the paperwork the secretary gave me and waited for my name to be called. I was waiting an hour and a half before it was finally my turn. When I walked into the office of my potential boss I nearly fainted. There sitting behind the desk looking straight at me with a look of recognition was Mike. As in Mike from the bar that saw mw rat-assed. As in Mike that had to help me home. As in Mike that I tried to pimp out to my ex. Well that's me fucked. "Bella?" he asked.

"Yea Mike. It's me"

"What are you doing in Phoenix last time I saw you, you were in New Hampshire getting over a gay boyfriend,"

"Well I couldn't handle being around him and my mother lives here so I transferred to finish college and now well here I am." There was an awkward silence; I had never been one for awkward silences so I blurted out "It's OK if you don't want to hire me after the last time saw me. I know I was shit-faced." To my surprise he started laughing.

"Oh that just wants to make me hire you even more. We had fun and I need that if we are going to work closely otherwise I would have to kill myself and we wouldn't want the world to be devoid of me now would we?" I couldn't help laughing at his response, it was so unexpected. "So here's the deal Bella, here's the job. I need someone I can have a laugh with. That's you. I need someone who is qualified. That's you. I need someone who is committed. That's who. I need someone who is passionate about literature. That's you. Any questions?" All I could do was shake my head in shock. "Well then welcome to the company"

That was that I became his assistant that day and had been ever since. I would have liked to eventually become an editor but I would work up to that and learn the ways of the publishing world. "Baby girl, how was the weekend?" Mike asked as he caught sight of me.

"Shouldn't I ask you that question? Last thing I saw of you Friday night was your hand on some hot guys cock" I said with a smirk.

"Well Tyler did have a glorious cock I couldn't help myself. It is so big and thick and pretty and I am going to marry it" he said dreamily.

"Riiiiight okie-dokie. Well while you carry on dreaming about cock I am going to get us some coffee."

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Author's note: Thanks for reading. If you have any comments, suggestions or questions let me know. I will update on Thursday.


	8. Déjà vu

Disclaimer: Body to body. Skin to skin. I don't own it so don't turn me in.

Author's note: I know I said I would update yesterday but ff is playing up for me. Does anyone know why it won't let me upload chapters?

BPOV

That week proceeded as normal. I went to work, came home, ignored Jacob (my boyfriend), and went to bed. I am such an ungrateful cow. Jacob was hot, loved me and had an ok sized cock. I mean I wasn't going to do much better. I knew I was pretty I got told often enough but I wasn't anything special. It's just that he was so annoying sometimes and he had the worst habit ever he always farts just after he comes. How off putting is that. I knew I would never find the perfect man because I had had him and lost him but really could I ever be happy? Or would I only ever be just OK? Jacob deserved better, he deserved someone to love them with their whole heart. So it was Friday and I had planned a dinner and was going to break up with Jacob. As I was standing in the kitchen I was suddenly hit with déjà vu. I felt like I had already been in the same position before but instead of hoping for the future I was destroying it. Jacob played for the Arizona Diamondbacks with Phil that is actually how we met and how was due home any second. I mentally gave myself a pep-talk. OK Bella you can do this. Remember it's not working out, you don't feel a spark, you just want to be friends.

"Hi I'm home" called Jacob from the hallway. Oh shit. Oh God. I can't do this. I can't break his heart. Oh my God I think I'm going to throw up I'm so nervous.

"I'm in the kitchen" I replied. He came into the kitchen and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Why don't you sit down while I serve dinner, we need to talk"

"Yeah I wanted to talk to you too"

"OK" I said as I put the plates on the table. "You go first."

"Well I think we should take a break for a little while" I almost choked when I heard that. I was not expecting that. Oh my shit. If he says he wants to fuck other people I am going to die.

"Why?" I manage to choke out.

"You are just so emotionally vacant. I love you. You know that but I don't think you love me. I mean you can't even say it." That part was true ever since Edward left I can't say it. It gives people too much power to hurt you. Oh well at least I haven't got to break up with him now.

"I understand Jacob, I really do. I am sorry that I can't say it. I want to but I just can't."

"Well how about you give me a call when you figure out what you want. I will wait for you to call one way or the other. I should probably move out huh."

"No don't be silly Jake; this is more your apartment then it is mine. I'll go stay with Mike for a little while, just until I figure things out."

"OK I'm going to head out while you pack some stuff up. I'll see you soon. I love you." With that he left. First things first call Mike.

"Hello" Mike sang into the phone.

"Hey it's Bella"

"What's going on hooker?"

"Well first of all of I'm a hooker you are my pimp. Second of all me and Jake split and I need a place to crash for a while."

"Oh baby girl are you alright? Why did you split? Is Jake alright? Is he still there? Do you want me to kick his ass?"

"Question overload. Yes I'm alright. I'm emotionally vacant. He seems alright. No he is gone and you couldn't kick his ass. He is huge and plays baseball."

"Alrighty then we will start from the beginning. Of course you can come over, I'll come pick you up and help you pack. The reason you are alright after a break up of a yearlong relationship is that you are emotionally vacant when it comes to men. Straight men anyway. I very seriously doubt Jacob is alright, that boy loves the shit out of you and I wouldn't personally kick his ass. I am not the butch in my relationships. I would get someone else too."

"No it's fine don't get one of your bitches to kick his ass just come and get me so we can go home and get drunk and eat ice cream."

"I'm on my way sugar."

Author's note: Again sorry for the delay. If you have any comments, questions or suggestions let me know. Thanks for reading.


	9. Who likes short shorts?

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Edward. I do however own a dildo called The Vamp. It sparkles in the sun and you can put it in the freezer so you can really imagine it is Edward.

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BPOV

I can't really remember the weekend me and Jake broke up. It is all a tequila and valium induced haze. The rest of the week passed by as normal, well as normal as it can be when you live with Mike. I will never get used to waking up and seeing Mike in tiny little hot pants. The best part of that is though he wakes me up by sitting on top of me, bouncing, singing "Who likes short shorts? We like short shorts." I really do not need to see his schlong swinging in front of my face first thing in the morning. However at work it was business as usual I had to meet with Alice and Rose for lunch to tell them what happened. You see even though I thought Edward was a knob jockey (literally) I had kept in touch with all the rest of them, including his parents. They moved out here after they graduated. Even though when I asked if it was for me they said no I knew it was and I am happy they loved me enough to do that.

It was finally Friday and me and Mike were hitting a club. Not a gay club, I told him specifically not a gay club. There is no way Mike got to have the fun. As we were getting ready or actually I should say as Mike was getting me ready I couldn't help but wonder if I was ready to meet someone tonight. Even though I am not in love with Jake I still loved him and cared for him. I just decided to not decide beforehand and if I meet someone that calls out to my lady parts then fair enough if not porn and my vibrator. Mike dressed in a dress that was just bordering slutty. It was midnight blue, the bottom was ruffled and barely covered my ass, the neckline was low and showed quite a bit of cleavage and the back, well there was no back until just above my ass. So commando tonight, completely commando bra and panties. Mike had styled my hair in loose curls and then messed them a little so it looked like I had just had a good fuck. My eyes were smoky and seductive and my lips looked kissable. I was ready to go. Mike looked good in some tight dark wash jeans and a pink button up shirt. But of course any outfit isn't complete without the perfect accessories so Mike had on some pink sparkly bracelets. He might as well be wearing a sign that said "I like bumming boys." The first club we got to was not as busy as expected so we had no trouble getting to the bar. After two shots and a screaming orgasm we left for another club. Now that one was packed so you know it has to be good. "Let's go to the bar bitch. I feel like having me some sex on the beach" Mike shouted in my ear as we made our way to the bar. After downing our drinks we decided to dance. I was grinding on Mike as I looked around the club to see if anyone caught my eye. When all of a sudden I was looking up a tall, dirty blonde haired bad boy. Oh yes ladies and gentlemen we have a winner.

He leant down and whispered in my ear "hi gorgeous I'm James."

"Hi James. I'm Bella."

I spun around so my back was against his chest and started dancing again. I use the term dancing loosely it was more like having sex with clothes on while standing up. James and I danced for an hour before we decided to go to the bar. "I'll have a beer, Bella?"

"I'll have a slow comfortable screw."

"I know that gorgeous but I was talking about a drink" he said cheekily.

After the drinks we danced again. I looked around for Mike and spotted him pushing some hot guy against the wall and attacking his mouth with his tongue. Well I guess I had to find my own way home. Suddenly I gasped it felt like all the oxygen was being drained out of the room. I focussed on breathing. Then I felt static run all over my body but concentrate on my erogenous zones. I felt myself being pulled into a strangely familiar pair of arms. I turned around and fund myself looking into a pair of emerald green eyes.

"Edward" I whispered.

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Author's note: Edward's back! Dum, dum, dum. I will update on either Wednesday or Thursday so we will see how Bella will react then. If you have any questions, comments or suggestions let me know. Thanks for reading.


	10. Felt like home

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. I only own some picture of Edward and Carlisle that are used regularly in my masterbalia collection.

Author's note: I'm sorry for the shortness of the chapter but I just found out that I am an auntie. I have a nephew; his name is Jacob Morgan Thomas. Yes I was disappointed when I found out his name because I am 100% team Edward but he wasn't named for Jacob Black so I'm OK with it.

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EPOV

Fuck me Phoenix was hot. I couldn't believe I was moving here, everywhere I had lived has been cold and wet but now I was going to live in the fucking desert. I had to move here though, all of my family have moved here. Even mom and dad were moving here. I am a first year resident and was starting at Ashes Hospital in two weeks. I couldn't wait to see the nurses at the hospital. I had fucked most of the hot nurses when interned at a hospital in New Hampshire and I was looking forward to finding some fresh ass. I had an apartment all lined up and this time I accepted help from mom and dad. When I was in Dartmouth they offered to buy me an apartment or at least pay the rent on one but I declined saying I wanted to do college on my own. For the first two years I was never in my dorm anyway I stayed with Bella. Oh shit. I felt my chest constrict painfully just like it did every time I thought about her or anyone mentioned her. Sometimes I would lie in bed alone because I would never bring a girl back to my bed, and I would think about what our life would be like if I hadn't been so shit scared. Would we be married by now? Would she be pregnant? Even just thinking about is scares the living shit out of me. My mother thinks I have a "commitment phobia". I used to think that one day I would settle down with a nice girl and raise a family but now I don't think so. The only person I could ever see myself spending the rest of my life with hates me. Maybe it is better this way I mean I could never see myself as a father. I like to go out get drunk and have hot sex and a child would get in the way of that. Yeah I know I am a selfish bastard but I am young and I work hard so I deserve to be selfish. I opened the door to my apartment and holy fuck is it beautiful. It's all black and chrome and the epitome of a bachelor pad. Every gadget and game imaginable is already here. I love my mother. Me, Jazz and Em are hitting the town later even though they are both in happy long-term relationships they are still my wingmen. I have about four hours to settle in and get as much as my shit unpacked as possible before I have to get ready. Fortunately it takes me like twenty minutes to get ready so I'll have time to knock a few back before my boys get here.

"Come in boys, door open" I called as I made my way to the fridge to get a round of beers for the boys.

"You ready to the Arizona bars Eddie?" asked Emmett.

"Of course I am. I'm Edward fucking Cullen. Emphasis on the fucking."

"You are such a man whore Edward" chimed in Jazz.

"Hey I do not charge Jazz"

"You should, you'd be a millionaire by now"

"Enough bitching you two. Let's make like a baby and head out"

Apparently we were heading to the hottest club in all of Arizona. I must admit it was pretty packed. Once we had bribed our way in we headed to the bar. As Jazz ordered our drinks I looked around for any interesting prospects to spend the night with, well a few hours with anyway. There was a blonde, with fake tits looking at me from the corner. She would be easy enough but I really did prefer natural tits perhaps if I was desperate at the end of the night I would find her. The drinks kept coming and so did the women wanting to dance with me. One after another blondes, brunettes and redheads. The boys just sat at the bar looking amused as they watched me, passing me a new drink when I had finished mine. Pretty soon I was drunk and I was feeling good until I saw her. My Bella was wrapped around another man. My Bella rubbing her tight, little ass on some others guys junk. Now if I was sober I might have realised that she wasn't my Bella anymore but in my drunken stupor she was mine. I walked up to where her and the blonde douche were standing. The closer I got to her the more the air between seemed to crackle with that familiar electricity. She seemed to be looking for someone, perhaps she was looking for me. That was the alcohol talking of course. When she was within arm's reach I pulled her into my arms. This felt right. This felt like home. She realised she had left the douches arms and turned to look at who had her now. There were so many emotions on her face. The most prominent, shock. She stared into my eyes and whispered "Edward".

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Author's note: Again I'm sorry I know a lot of you are anxious for Bella's reaction and I was planning on putting it in but I wasn't planning on my nephew being born as he is a week early. I will post Bella's reaction tomorrow though. Thanks for reading. . If you have any questions, comments or suggestions let me know.


	11. Are you high?

Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't own it.

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BPOV

Holy fuck on duck. Edward Cullen was here. Edward Cullen was holding me. Edward Cullen was grinding his hard dick on me. OK I think I just came a little. OK I had to snap out of it. He left me. He left me to fuck guys. "Edward" I shouted in his ear "what the fuck are you doing here?"

"In Phoenix? In this club? Or with you specifically?"

"Well all fucking three would be good"

"Bella can we maybe go somewhere and talk?" he asked. Everything in me screamed no, don't go, he'll only hurt you again but like the idiot I am I agreed. I turned to James to inform I was leaving, he asked for my number and I gave it to him but I doubt he would ever call. When I looked back to Edward he looked pissed perhaps he doesn't want to go talk anymore. I was just about to ask him but he gripped my hand and started pulling me towards the exit. Once we outside I sent a quick text to Mike telling him that I was OK and I would see him at home later tonight, if he got home tonight.

"So where did you want to talk?" I asked.

"Well my apartment is only three blocks away; it's a nice night we could walk there"

"You must be new to Phoenix because it is always a nice night here"

"Yes I am I haven't been here long." The rest of the walk was spent in an uncomfortable silence. We arrived all too soon and I started freaking out. What the hell was I supposed to say to the man that shattered my heart? What was I supposed to say to the love of my life when he loves cock? I wish I had drunk a lot more now I needed some liquid courage perhaps he has some. He let us in to his apartment after fumbling with the keys for about ten minutes. Oh my fuck, this place is such a cliché. It looked exactly like you imagined a bachelor pad would. We looked at each other nervously, each waiting for the other to break the awkward silence. Finally Edward asked me if I wanted anything to drink.

"Alcohol" I said a little too enthusiastically. Great he probably thinks I'm an alcoholic.

"So" he said when he returned with two beers "what have you been up to since I saw you last?"

"Well I graduated from Phoenix College first in my class and I am now working as an assistant to an editor at Eclipse Publishing. I'm training to be an editor. That's about it really."

"So no boyfriend?"

"Not at the moment. What about you do you have a boyfriend?"

"I am not dating anyone no but – wait, hang on did you ask me if I had a boyfriend?"

"Well yeah I mean you don't have to tell me I was just wondering"

"Bella that's not it I don't mind you asking, it's just that I wouldn't have a boyfriend because I'm not gay"

"Anymore?" I asked confused.

"No I have never been gay. Where did you hear that because there was a rumour going around Dartmouth about that"

"Well you told me you were"

"Bella are you fucking high? I never ever told you that" he squeaked.

"Yes you did on the night we broke up"

"Please enlighten me at what point did I say that I like guys?" he asked frustrated.

"When you said that you wanted to . . ." I had to take a deep breath to say this "fuck other PEOPLE. See you said people not girls so I put two and two together" I didn't to finish that sentence before he interrupted.

"And you made fucking five"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I asked angrily.

"Bella sweetie I am not gay. I can't believe you would think that after everything we had been through"

"Well that is my fucking point Edward. Why after all we had been through, all we had planned, why would you throw that all away if it wasn't because you were gay?"

"Do you want the honest answer or do you want me to sugar-coat it?"

"I just want the truth" I said.

"I got scared. Scared that my life was already planned out ahead of me. Scared that I wouldn't get to experience the world. Scared you were going to be the only woman I would ever have sex with. I know I was selfish and childish but I have changed I promise give me a chance to prove it to you" He said as he started kissing my neck. I don't even know when he moved closer to me. God he good. He hadn't really touched me yet and I was already dripping wet. I know that I should have stopped it but no one I have ever been with has ever made me feel the way Edward does. I can't even remember how many times I have had to fake it with Jake. I wanted to have an orgasm that wasn't self-induced and I knew that Edward could do that. So in my alcohol riddled mind I decided to give myself over to the sensations and urges I felt. I would worry about everything else tomorrow. I attacked his mouth with my own; he tasted as good as I remember. It felt like no time had passed. We kissed like we had never stopped. Our tongues fighting for dominance, I let him win I was too turned on to fight right now. When we had to breathe he started kissing my neck and chest. Only feather light kisses, teasing me. I wasn't standing for that it had been three years since we had last been together and I needed him to fuck me hard.

"Edward strip now" I commanded. He jumped away slightly looking slightly shocked at me. I used to let him be the dominant one in our sexual relationship but I was different now. I had matured sexually. While he was getting undressed I did too. I couldn't bear to wait any longer then I had to. Once we were both naked we just looked at each other getting reacquainted with each other's body. He is so fucking beautiful. I couldn't wait to feel him inside me.

"Edward lie on the bed" and he did. Well this is fun I like being in control. I straddled his waist. "What do you want Edward?" I asked.

"I want you Bella. Fuck I want you so much"

"How do you want me?"

"Well fist of all I have to say hello to my girls I have missed them" he said. He flipped us over so he was hovering on top of me then he kissed each of my breasts softly. The he started licking my right nipple slowly while pinching my left slowly. Fuck the girls missed you too Edward. He suckled each of them in turn and I was about ready to cum already. After lavishing attention on my breasts he dragged his lips down my body until he reached my soaking pussy. "Bella you smell so delicious I think I am going to have to taste you is that OK?" he asked. Like I was going to fucking turn that down.

"Yes" I hissed out as he took a long lick up my slit. After a few more licks he stared to lick my clit. Finally I man who knows where it is. When he started sucking on my clit I could feel the coil in my stomach tighten to unbelievable point. When he thrust two fingers in without warning and started pumping them in and out of me I lost. The coil snapped and I came shouting his name.

"Edward there are so many things I want to do to you and with but I don't think I can wait another second for you to be inside me so just fuck me already" I screamed out when he thrust in me. I had forgotten how big he was. He stopped for a moment to let me adjust to his size. After a while I got impatient and thrust my hips up to show him to move. He started slowly pumping in and out. I could feel every vein and ridge. It was delicious. I could feel my orgasm building already, I needed more.

"Harder, faster. Oh God Edward that's it oh fuck" I shouted as he sped up his movements. The room was filled with our moans. Just the sound of Edwards moan made me want to come alone.

"Fuck Bella I can't last much longer you feel so good, touch yourself for me baby. Make yourself come with me" I slipped my hand between us and started my already oversensitive clit. I rubbed it in time with his thrust which were getting faster by the minute. Finally when he whispered in my ear "come for me darlin' " I came. Calling me darlin' is a major turn on for me. The feeling of me milking his cock must have been too much because less than thirty seconds later he came yelling my name. We didn't say anything as we both lay there catching our breath. I had every intention of getting dressed and going home but I must have fallen asleep.

I woke up the next morning feeling like there was road construction going on in my head. I lifted my head, which felt like it weighed a ton and looked around at the unfamiliar room. I lifted the blanket off me and I was naked. Oh fuck, well this couldn't be good. I heard a light snore coming from behind me. I turned over to see who I was in bed with and all I could see was a mop of bronze sex hair and oh I remembered now. I was royally fucked.

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Author's note: So here is Bella's reaction. This is my first lemon and I was really nervous writing it so if you have any comments on it let me know. Thanks for reading.


	12. The best threesome known to man

Disclaimer: I don't own them. I just like to borrow them for some sexy, fun times.

Author's note: I am so sorry I know I supposed to update last Sunday but my wonderful fiancé decided to surprise me for Valentine's Day. I have been in Paris all week and got back early yesterday morning. I spent all day with my daughter because a week without her was torture.

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Oh sit. How the fuck did I end up fucking the guy that ruined my life? I am so fucking stupid. Geez all he had to do was flash me that gorgeous smile and I dropped my panties. God I am such a slut. How the hell am I going to get out of this situation? I know leave now, get rid of all evidence and deny everything. Ok maybe that won't work I can't lie for shit. So I could either leave before he wakes up and hope that I never run in to him again or I wait until he wakes up and tell I'm leaving like the adult I am. Of course I decided on the former. I got out of bed as quietly as possible and started gathering up my strewn clothes. Where the fuck are my panties? Oh yeah that's right I didn't wear any. I'm such a slut. My dress was half way on when I heard someone clearing their throat. I quickly pulled on my dress the rest of the way and turned around. Fuck he's up. I couldn't catch a break. I couldn't look him in the eye so instead I found myself lowering my eyes to his bare chest. Great now I'm getting wet again. I reluctantly lifted my eyes to meet his. I didn't know what to make of all the emotions swirling in his mesmerising eyes. After staring into each other's eyes for several minutes I finally snapped out of the trance and began to put my shoes on. "So . . . I guess I'll get going" I said nervously, I just wanted to get out of there go home and shower the smell of Edward and sex off me.

"You don't have to . . . I mean shouldn't we talk about what happened or something"

"If you want to I suppose, you did say last night that you had changed and wanted to prove that to me"

"Yeah about that . . . I am kind of not really looking for a relationship right now. We are amazing in bed together though so maybe we could be like fuck buddies or something"

"Hang on, let me get this right. You want me want to be my friend, fuck other women and then when you are bored you want me to let you fuck me. Is that about right?"

"Yeah that sums it up I guess"

"You are an unbelievable prick" I said as I slapped his pretty little face.

"What the hell was that for?" he asked. How thick was this bastard? How did my sweet Edward turn into such a dick?

"You are the most egotistical asshole I have ever met. You just waltz back into my life and my bed then turn around and ask me to be your little whore on the side when you fuck anything with a hole between its legs. God that's it. I'm leaving. Don't call me. Don't try and find me. Don't ask my friends about me. I'm through with you Edward fucking Cullen." I grabbed my bag and stormed out of his apartment. What an asshole! Why did I have to sleep with him? Don't get me wrong the boy can fuck but he comes with all this drama. Things used to be so simple between us, we just loved each other. That was enough to see us through any drama. Now he is a twat and a man-whore and a probably a walking STD. Fuck we didn't use a condom who knows what that boys is carrying. Thank God I'm on the pill. I do not need a little Eddie running around. I need Mike and shots.

I arrived back at the apartment five minutes before Mike did. "Hiya honey I'm home" he sang as he entered. "OMG! I think I'm in love. Seth is so cute. Yet so rugged at the same time. The boy has a magic tongue and a huge dong. He is perfect."

"So I'm glad you enjoyed yourself"

"Hold on I just came out of my cock-coma and realised that you have on the same clothes as last night, have sex hair that could rival Rob Pattinson and just generally have that freshly fucked look about you. Something you would like to share with the class?"

"IsleptwithEdwardCullen" I breathed out in one word.

"What?"

"I kind of, sort of slept with Edward Cullen a little bit"

"This is your gay ex-lover right?"

"Yes but-"

"The one you tried to set me up with?"

"Well yes but-"

"Are you fucking crazy or high or drunk?"

"First of all let me finish my fucking sentence. Second of all he isn't gay. Third I was a little drunk from the alcohol YOU were pouring down my neck"

"Do not blame this on me. It is not my fault that you have zero self control when it comes to your pussy"

"I so resent that"

"Oh really remember before you came to work for me all those one night stands with hot pieces of man meat. What your pussy wanted it got"

"You weren't even there, how do you know?"

"I hear things"

"From who?"

"You have the biggest mouth when you're drunk and Alice and Rose have big mouths all the time"

"Anyway moving on from my sluttiness what the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Well what happened?" he asked.

"I saw him at the club; we danced, went back to his place, talked then fucked"

"What did he say this morning? Or did you leave the money on the bedside table and run?"

"I was going to run no money involved pimp but then he woke up"

"And?"

"And he said he wanted to continue fucking me"

"Well that's a good thing isn't it baby girl?"

"As his and I quote "fuck buddy" so he wants to fuck other women and then come to see me and fuck me"

"The man is a bigger man-whore than me"

"What is wrong with me Mike that I am not enough for him? Why can't I ever be enough for him? Whether for sex or more."

"Honey there is nothing wrong with you and I know there is nothing wrong with you in the bedroom. You girl are an animal once you get going."

"Thanks I think"

"So here is what we are going to do. You are going to have the best three-some known to man with my favourite men – Ben and Jerry. Then we are going to drink cheap vodka until we puke while watching classic chick flicks. How's that sound?" he asked while stroking my hair.

"Perfect" I am going to forget all about Edward fucking Cullen.

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Author's note: Again I am so sorry for the delay. However I couldn't waste an opportunity to spend any alone time with my fiancé. It was nice to be as loud as we liked without having to worry about waking the baby. After a while you want more than a quickie in the bathroom while the baby has a nap. Let me know if you have any comments, suggestions or questions for this chapter. Also I really need a beta, I never seem to have the time to really read and evaluate my writing. If anyone is interested let me know. Thanks for reading.


	13. Do I not have an internal filter?

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. If I did I would make Carlisle and Edward do bad things to each other while I watched. ;)

Author's note: I really, really need a beta. I have no time to edit and evaluate my stories. If anyone is interested please let me know. I'm desperate.

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EPOV

I just had the best fucking dream ever. I dreamt that I saw Bella again and we fucked all night before falling asleep in each other's arms. Just like it used to be. I miss that. What the fuck is that rustling? If Emmett or Jasper wake me up I am going to fucking kill them. I cracked open one eye to see who was disturbing my sleep to see Bella hurriedly pulling on a little blue dress. What the fuck? Did I not dream last night? Was it real? It must be. She was here, in my room getting dressed. I cleared my throat to get her attention. She pulled on the rest of her dress and turned around to face me though she couldn't meet my eyes. She was staring at my chest. Yeah all the ladies loved it. I worked out like a motherfucker to get this six-pack. She finally raised her eyes to meet mine and we just stared into each other's eyes for what seemed like hours but was only a few minutes. She was the one to finally break the trance I was in. "So . . . I guess I'll get going" she said rather awkwardly.

"You don't have to . . . I mean shouldn't we talk about what happened or something" I said although what I really wanted to do involved no clothes and Bella's lips wrapped around my cock.

"If you want to I suppose, you did say last night that you had changed and wanted to prove that to me" Holy shit. I did say that. But I hadn't changed really. I was still a dickhead most of the time. How did I get myself into these situations? I didn't want to lose her again but I didn't think I can handle a relationship either. I had the perfect solution!

"Yeah about that . . . I am kind of not really looking for a relationship right now. We are amazing in bed together though so maybe we could be like fuck buddies or something" I am a genius.

"Hang on, let me get this right. You want me want to be my friend, fuck other women and then when you are bored you want me to let you fuck me. Is that about right?" Wow that sounds fantastic. I would have the perfect life. I would get to fuck hot, slutty women and still come home to Bella. The woman that I love.

"Yeah that sums it up I guess"

"You are an unbelievable prick" she yelled as she slapped me across my face. Bitch was crazy. I didn't say anything that bad did I? I mean we are both adults.

"What the hell was that for?"

"You are the most egotistical asshole I have ever met. You just waltz back into my life and my bed then turn around and ask me to be your little whore on the side when you fuck anything with a hole between its legs. God that's it. I'm leaving. Don't call me. Don't try and find me. Don't ask my friends about me. I'm through with you Edward fucking Cullen." OK maybe I did deserve the slap. Fuck it sounded really bad when Bella said it. I am an asshole. I can't help it though. I was scared before and now it is just what I do. I sleep around. That's what my life has been since Bella left. I f Bella had stayed I probably would have grown out of it within a couple of months and begged her to take me back. But I had no reason to stop and it made me forget about everything for a little while. While I was contemplating on my life, it walked out the door. I had always known that Bella was my life and that we were meant to be together. I just wanted to live a little before we settled down. Is that too much to ask. I didn't think so. Would she agree if I asked her to wait for me? I will be ready some day, I think. Does she still love me? And if she does, does she love me enough to wait until I'm ready? I am only twenty three. I am not done sowing my wild oats and shit. I don't want to be tied down yet. Is that a crime? If I attempted a relationship right now I would fuck it up. I don't want to fuck it up with Bella. At the moment I am far too used to fucking any girl I find attractive. I don't think I could just turn that off, even if I was in a relationship. I need advice. I will have to call Jazz and Em; they are both in long-term, monogamous relationships. I need to know how they do it.

An hour later they were both at my door after a rather cryptic phone call on my part. I let them in and handed out a round of beers. I for one was going to need it. We all sat down and then they just stared at me, waiting for me to tell them why they were here. Shit where the hell to I start?

"I fucked Bella last night" I all but shouted at them. Fucking hell, do I not have an internal filter? Must I always say the first thing I think?

"I'm sorry you did what now?" asked Emmett.

"I fucked Bella last night"

"Swan?" asked Jasper.

"What other Bella do we know" I replied getting irritated. They both just stared slack jawed at me. "Why the fuck are you both staring at me like that?"

"I'm sorry I just can't believe that you slept with her? Where the fuck did you even see her?" asked Emmett.

"I saw in the club and she was dancing, and I use the term loosely, with some guy. Seeing her with someone else just broke me. I had to speak to her and touch her. I was pretty drunk so I did. I went over to her and started grinding on her and then I asked her if we could talk. She came back here, we talked. I found out she though I broke up with her because I was gay and she must have told someone. I think that is how the rumour at college started. We were talking and the next thing I knew we were fucking like bunnies. When I woke up this morning she was getting dressed, trying to sneak out without waking me. We had an argument and she left telling me never to contact her again."

"OK first things first what the hell did you say to get Bella into bed because she hates you?" asked Jasper.

"I told her I had changed and that I was going to prove it to her" I replied.

"Do you have any intention of changing?" asked Emmett.

"No, not really and that is what the argument was about this morning. I told her I still wanted to sleep with other girls and I didn't want to lose Bella so I asked her if we could be fuck buddies, I think I called it."

"So let me get this straight you asked your ex, who you were seeing for 7 years and who happens to be the love of your life, to be your fuck buddy so you could still fuck other people and you said this to her even though this was the reason you broke up with her?" asked Jasper seemingly disbelieving.

"Yeah" was all I could say. I was a dick.

"You little fucker!" shouted Emmett coming towards me. I felt pain in my jaw before darkness overtook me.

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Author's note: There it is Edwards POV, some people were commenting on what a dickhead Edward is being. He does have his reasons although they don't justify his behaviour. Will he change? Thanks for reading everyone. If you have any questions, comments or suggestions let me know. If anyone is interested being the beta for this story let me know.


	14. Remove his balls with a spoon

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the books. If I did they would not be suitable for children.

Author's note: I want to thank my fantastic Beta CullenxVamp. I'm sorry for not updating sooner but FF would not let me upload chapters again.

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BPOV

How much did I drink last night? Even my teeth are aching. God damn Mike and his vodka gel-lo and vodka milkshakes. He is very creative when it comes to vodka. I haven't felt this bad since my first college frat party. Me and Edward got invited and thought it would be fun. Of course he disappeared with some guys he met, playing football in the yard. Guy's were just handing me drinks, as soon as I had finished one I would have another in my hand. By the time Edward came back inside an hour and a half later. I was passed out on the couch; while some drunken frat boy tried to feel me up or so I am told. Edward punched frat boy in the face, picked me up and took me back to my apartment. The hangover I woke up with lasted for three days. I didn't drink again for nearly a year I think this will rival that party, I was so fucked up out of my mind that night, I almost swore off anything with alcoholic for life! I am certainly not remembering a lot from last night. I have a flash of an image. Me and Mike singing along to the Spice Girls using dildos as microphones. Oh dear God. I really hope I am imagining that; I wouldn't be the least surprised if we actually broke something. I laid there for about ten minutes before I had to bolt to the bathroom, fuck me. I think I threw up everything I had eaten or drunk in the last week. I emerged an hour later to find Mike asleep on the dining room table. He was wearing a Geri Halliwell British flag dress. Now where the hell did he get that? I look around at the apartment and let me tell you it is trashed. It looks like a frat house the morning after a party. I am not even going to attempt to clean the way I feel right now I will just throw which would add to the mess. Why did I get so was wasted again? Oh yes, Edward. I must say maybe it was a mistake to talk to Mike about it. His answer whenever I am upset is to get me drunk. When Edward first dumped me, OK that was more me than him but still. When I broke up with Jake and now every time. Perhaps it's time I called in my girls. Though it may be a tad awkward seeing as Alice is his sister and Rose will be his sister in law but they are my best friends and maybe they will be able to look at this subjectively because they know us both. Mike just wants to remove Edward's balls with a spoon. I kind of do too maybe I can hit him hard enough on the head to make him stop being such an ass.

By noon they were at Mike's apartment I was feeling much too rough to leave the apartment today. Mike still hadn't moved but I did check his pulse and he has one so I am not too worried. I let them in and led them to what was the living room under the empty bottles of vodka, jack, beer and some German shit that I had no idea what it was. Fuck how much did I drink? Shit last number I can think of is eight; no wonder I threw up for an hour. "So what's up Bella?" asked Alice as she surveyed the apartment.

Before I could answer Rose cut in "did you and Mike have a party last night and not invite us?" she asked.

"No, it was just me and Mike, I think" I said, I really couldn't rule out the possibility of no one else being there.

"Christ Bella how are you not in the ER right now for alcohol poisoning getting your stomach pumped?" asked Alice incredulously.

"I have developed a high tolerance" I said even though I was wondering the same thing now that she mentioned it.

"You drunk more than me, Alice, Jazz and Em could drink put together. Where is your partner in crime?" asked Rose.

"On the dining table" I replied simply, like I said it every day. They both looked to where the dining table was situated and burst out laughing. Now that the hangover had waned a little I notice that Mike looked like a drag queen with the amount of makeup he had on. Bright pink eye shadow, false eyelashes, pink blush and red lipstick. I picked my phone if the coffee table and snapped a picture of him. This was going to be blackmail material for years. They both turned to me when they heard the click of the camera on my phone.

"Why?" Rose asked the same time Alice asked "how?"

"Absolutely no idea. Can't remember a lot of what happened."

"Well what happened for this" gesturing around at the living room "to happen?" Rose asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

Alice chirped in saying "every time you are upset or even have a bad day at work Mike gets you trashed, don't think we haven't noticed, the state on this place it must have been really, really bad."

"It was"

"So what happened hun?" asked Rose.

"I slept with someone" I said really not wanting to tell them who.

"So what is the big deal, I have lost count how many one night stand and flings you have had" Rose said. Well if I didn't feel like a slut before, I did now. Was I that bad?

"This was different" I said.

"How? Who was it?" Alice asked. She had to ask, didn't she?

"Edward" I mumbled hoping by some miracle they didn't hear.

"Edward. As in Cullen?" Rose shouted.

"Yeah" I said as I burst out crying. What were they going to think of me? I couldn't lose them, they were like my sisters. They both rushed over to me and sat on either side of me while hugging me. After cooing in my ear that everything was going to be alright for ten minutes the tears finally stopped.

"Honey you need to tell what happened. I mean where did you see him? What did he say? What did you say? You hated him so how come you slept with him? Did it feel like old times? Was he good?" Alice rushed out in one breath.

"Calm down I will tell you, starting with why he left in the first place" and I did leaving no detail out. I told her what he said when he left me, they didn't know about this and offered to castrate him. I told them of how I thought he was gay and what I told Jessica. I told them of how we saw each other at the club, I told them of how he told me he had changed and wanted to give us another chance. I told them that it was among the best sex I have ever had and then I told them what he said this morning.

"I am going to kill that fucking idiot!!" yelled Rose.

"I am going to tell mom" said Alice. At this I laughed, I can just imagine Esme's reaction to what Edward asked me. Esme had always considered me a daughter just like I had always considered her a mother. She would not put up with anyone disrespecting me, not even her own son, especially her own son she had raised him better than that.

"So how are you feeling about this whole thing?" Alice asked.

"Well I feel worthless, like I am not enough for him, you know? I feel angry at him and angry at myself for giving into him. I am grieving for my Edward, for the love of my life because I feel like he has died. He isn't my Edward anymore he is someone that doesn't care about anything other than getting his pole waxed."

"He is an asshole honey, forget about him." Rose tried to comfort me.

"That's the thing though; I have spent the last three years trying to get over him. Why do you think I slept with all those guys? I just wanted to forget him. I thought I was over him. Then he comes back into my life and within an hour I am in his bed." I was interrupted by a phone ringing. Alice excused herself to answer it. Me and Rose stayed silent while we waited for her to return. When she came back her face showed she was worried.

"What is it Ali?" I asked worried myself.

"It's Edward. He's in hospital."

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Author's note: Thanks for reading. Any questions, comments or suggestions let me know.


	15. Brother bear

Disclaimer: I do not own it. Wish I did but I don't.

Author's note: Thanks to my brilliant beta CullenxVamp.

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EPOV

Beep! Beep! Beep! What is that annoying fucking noise? "I think he is waking up" I heard a voice chirp.

"Quick call the doctor" an angelic voiced called out. I tried to open my eyes but my eyes lids felt like they weighed a ton each.

"Mr Cullen can you hear me? Squeeze my hand if you can hear me?" Who the fuck is this douche of course I can hear him. I squeeze his hand anyway. "That's good can you open your eyes?" I try again and manage to open my eyes slightly but the blinding light immediately makes me shut them again. I blinked until I could handle the light in the room and looked up to six concerned pairs of eyes. "How are you feeling Mr Cullen?" asked what I assume was a doctor.

"Good" I croaked, my mouth was as dry as a nun's pussy.

"I'll go get him some water" announced Bella before she fled from the room. What the hell was she doing here? Where is here?

"What happened? Where am I?" I asked.

"You are at Ashes hospital. You have a bad concussion and have been unconscious for five hours." replied my doctor.

"How?" I asked confused the last thing I remembered was talking to Emmett and Jazz in my apartment after that nothing. Everyone in the room started shifting uncomfortably. No-one said anything until Bella walked back in the room. She walked over to my bed and placed the cup of water she was holding to my lips.

"Drink" she said. I did until the glass was drained.

"Now can someone tell me why the fuck I am in a hospital bed please?"

"Must be feeling like your normal asshole self if you can swear" Bella muttered under her breath but I caught it.

"Tell me what the hell is going on!" I yelled. They all looked at each other waiting for someone to start talking, no-one did.

"This is ridiculous, it can't be that bad guys" I said trying to get someone talking.

"I think Em should tell seeing as it is his fault" said Rose. Emmett whipped his head around to look at her pleadingly but after a glare from Rose he sighed resigned.

"Alright I'll tell you but just remember I am sorry OK?"

"Fine just get on with it"

"Well do you remember telling me and Jazz what happened with Belly-bean?"

"Yeah I remember that" Belly-bean? Only Emmett.

"Well after you told us what you did and said to Bells I got a teeny bit angry. I think of her as my little sister and I love her like one. So when an asshole messes with her – that would be you – I get a little overprotective. The girls call it when my brother bear comes out, anyway I punched you. In the face."

"I know you are a big guy Em but how the fuck did you give me a concussion and knock me out for five hours?" I asked confused.

"Well I did hit you pretty hard so you went down. On your way down you hit your head on the coffee table" It came back to me in a flash. Emmett shouting. The pain. I can't believe my own brother hit me.

"Fuck Em, you fucking hit me" I said incredulously.

"Yeah well maybe you deserved it" Bella mumbled yet again.

"I'm sorry Bella but if you have something to say to me could you say it my face instead of muttering under your breath" I said angrily.

"I said you fucking deserved it. I hit you too encase you forgot. I'm glad Em hit you too he is bigger than me and it obviously hurt a hell of a lot more. Maybe you are feeling just a little bit of the pain I have been through because of your selfish, self-centred ass." She blew out in one breath. "You know what I only came to see if you were alright because I was worried. I can see you are feeling better so I am going to take off. Rose, Alice I will ring you guys later." Then she flew out of my hospital room as quick as her gorgeous legs would carry her.

"Edward you really are a dick. After everything you have put her through I think she has the right to have a little bit of an attitude with you, don't you? Then you have to call her out on it and make her even angrier. I am surprised she even came with us to see if you were all right after what you did and said to her. Yes she told me and Rose about it and as soon as you are released from here we will be having a chat about your behaviour. If you are lucky I won't tell mom because she would be ashamed of the man-whore you have become. I am going to go see if Bella is really alright. I expect you to think about what I said and we will talk later." My sister said before leaving. My god that girl can rant. They all stared at me in shock, I don't think any of them were expecting Alice to go off on me like that as we had always been very close and had never had any serious arguments before. Rose looked at me took a breath like she was going to talk and then stopped.

"Spit it out Rose, I know you want a say too" I said.

"I wanted to kill you earlier, I really did. Bella is one of my best friends, a sister even. She is a beautiful person inside and out and what scares me is that she can't see that. She knows that guys think she is hot but all she thinks that guys want off her a quick fuck. You were the love of her life and the way she sees it if all you want is q quick fuck what chance has she got of finding someone who wants more? You are hurting her can't you see that? Please for her sake just stay away from her." I was shocked. I expected her to yell at me and threaten me but that I wasn't expecting. "I'm going to go see if Bella is OK. See you later baby, Jasper" Then it was just us guys.

"I have really fucked up haven't I?" I asked to no-one in particular.

"Yeah man you have. I think you should take Rose's advice for the time being. Bella has had it rough and you are not helping" said Jasper. They were all right. I wasn't good for her. The only question was now she was back in my life how was I going to let her go again?

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Author's note: Thanks for reading. Any comments, questions or suggestions let me know.


	16. God hates me

Disclaimer: I want to own but sadly I don't. God hates me.

Author's note: Sorry for the extremely long delay in updating but I have had the flu and when I finally got round to writing I was suffering from writer's block. Thanks to my wonderful beta CullenxVamp. Go and check out the story that I am helping on WhoaThatsImpossible! and her other story Elemento love.

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BPOV

You would think that I would be used to this new Edward by now. I have plenty of examples of his new asshole behaviour but he still managed to surprise me. How did my Edward become this dickhead? I know Esme raised him better than this and Carlisle always instilled that women are to be treated with respect into both his boys. They both grew up watching Carlisle treat Esme like a queen; you would think that would be enough for Edward to not treat women like blow up dolls to only be used for his pleasure. I know that both his and my parents were expecting me us to the first to get married and have kids. Hell before we left for graduation Esme took me to one side and said that when the time came she would love for me to wear her wedding dress. I couldn't stop the tears from flowing when I told her that I would be honoured. Edward found us both crying in one another's arms. Now I can't see him ever getting married, he fled in terror when I wanted him to move in with me. I still hate thinking about that day. That was the day my perfect life and ideal future fell apart. That was the first day that I had ever really experienced heartache or even hurt. My life had always been rather sheltered. Apart from my parents splitting up which I was too young to remember I have had an easy life. I contemplate on all this on the cab ride home from the hospital. When I get home I look to the dining table to check on Mike, he however must have woken up because he is gone. "Mike you OK?" I shout to the apartment.

"I'm just getting dressed, be out in a second baby girl" he yelled back. As I wait semi-patiently for Mike to emerge from his bedroom I begin to wonder what will happen now. I can't live with Mike forever even if it has been fun. I think I will start looking for an apartment soon.

"You will tell me everything later but right now I am late for a date with Seth. Bye hun" he sung as he skipped through the door. Now what? I ask myself. I look around at what used to be Mikes living room but now looks like the inside of a trash can. I'll tidy up and then do laundry I decide. Ten minutes later Alice turned up at my door, she starts talking at me before I can even say hello.

"I am so sorry about my ass of a brother. I don't know why he acts this way; he never used to be like this. You know, he used to be the perfect gentleman. Don't worry we will be having words" she said.

"Alice I – hold on" I said as a knock at my door cuts me off. Rosalie is there.

"Are you OK?" she asks.

"Girls seriously I am fine. He is a dick. You both know that I have dealt with dicks before and not just in the way I know you girls are thinking about but I will just pick myself up and move on just like I always do. Now I don't want to sound like an ungrateful bitch but I really want to be left alone. I will call you if I need anything OK"

"OK but don't hesitate to call any of us if you need to we all love you" Alice said as she and Rose left.

I spent the next 2 hours cleaning every inch of the apartment. I had just decided to take a shower when there was a knock at the door again. "What do you want now bitches?" I yelled on my way to the door assuming it was Rose and Alice again. It was not. "Jake, what are you doing here?" I asked when I had opened the door surprised at my visitor.

"Can we talk?" he asked nervously.

"Of course. You want to come in?" I asked standing to the side so he could enter.

"Could we go out? Maybe get some coffee? If it's all right with you" he suggested.

"That's fine, come on in while I change" I said as I started towards my room to change. After quickly throwing on a comfy pair of skinny jeans and a rolling stones t-shirt I returned to the living room where Jake was sitting rigidly on one of the couches. "Alright let's head out" I said as I grabbed my purse on the way to the door. We walked to the nearest Starbuck in silence. This is so unlike us we are usually so comfortable around each other, never an awkward silence but today we just don't feel right. We each ordered our usual and sat down at a quiet booth in the back.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I asked after several minutes of silence.

"Well . . ." he began before I cut him off.

"Edward" I said out loud in disbelief. What are the chances that Edward would walk in the same fucking coffee shop I'm in? And oh fuck he isn't alone. God hates me.

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Author's note: Sorry again for the delay, hopefully it won't be so long next time. If you have any questions, comments or suggestions let me know. Thanks for reading.


	17. Skinny bitch

Disclaimer: Everything Twilight does not belong to me. It belongs to the wonderful Stephanie Meyer who is probably the luckiest bitch alive.

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BPOV

"No, my name is Jacob," Jake said looking hurt.

"I know that," I said, "but remember me telling you about my ex. The one that wanted to fuck other people?"

"Yeah, I remember. Edward wasn't it?" he said as a look of comprehension crossed his face.

"Yes it was and that same Edward is currently sitting opposite us with a very attractive blonde," I explained, jealousy colouring my tone.

"Oh" was all he said as he turned around to catch a glimpse of my ex and his apparent new bed-mate.

"Anyway enough about him, what was it you wanted to speak to me about?"

"Well, I have been thinking about us the last couple of days and I think that we should get back together," he rushed out. At least I understood the nervousness now. Poor thing, he looked like he was going to throw up any moment. I decided to throw him a bone and reached across the table and took both his hands and tangled them with mine. He looked up at me and smiled gratefully. "Look, Bella, I know I said that we should take a break and at the time I thought that it was for the best but I did something that made me realize what a fool I was."

I looked at him waiting for him to continue, I was intrigued now, when he didn't I asked, "Well what did you do?"

"I got drunk," he said the paused looking at me for a reaction, I think.

"Is that it?" I asked incredulously. I knew he didn't get drunk often but it wasn't as if it was the first time.

"No, I wish it was," he said ominously before resuming, "I also got high." _Shit that was a first_. He had been disappointed in me when he found out that I had dabbled in drugs and still did from time to time.

"Oh, Jake. I'm sorry; I know you must be disappointed in yourself," I said as I walked over to him and gave him a hug. His father had died of a drug overdose so I knew that he would be beating himself up for being so stupid. He tucked his face into the crook of my neck and inhaled, he wrapped his arms around me tight and even though his arms felt safe and warm I knew I didn't belong in them. A loud clattering sound broke us apart; we automatically looked over to where the sound emanated from. Of course, it had to be from Edwards's table. A cup had seemingly been dropped on to the floor. When I looked up I caught the hostile stare Edward was giving Jacob. If looks could kill Jake would be six feet under. When Edward turned his attention to me however his eyes swam with sadness, anger, regret and jealousy? I turned away from Edward's eyes before I could become too entranced by them and turned my attention back to Jake. He seemed oblivious to the non-verbal exchange that had taken place and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"You shouldn't feel sorry for me, Bella, I did something else even worse than that. I am a bad person," he declared looking dejected.

"You are one of the best people I know. You could never be a bad person. You can tell me anything, you know," I encouraged.

"Ihadathreesome" he said in a single breath. _Now that I was not expecting. _

"OK" I said slowly trying to take in what he had said.

"I feel so guilty because even though we were on a break, we didn't talk about seeing other people. It would have been bad enough just cheating on you with one person but two, God what kind of monster am I?" he asked rhetorically. I couldn't say anything; I just sat there looking at him. He took this opportunity to scoot his chair as close to me as humanly possible. "I know what I did was wrong, Bella, I know that but I just did it because I was drunk, high and lonely and those aren't excuses just facts. You are so good and pure I know you must be disgusted that I could do that to you when we were still technically together but could you find it in your heart to forgive me? I love you," he said as looked at me with hope in his big, brown eyes. I looked around the room, trying to find the words that seem to be evading me. Like a moth drawn to the flame, my eyes couldn't help but look his way. He seemed to be alternating between sending seething looks toward my table and lustful glances at his companion (and that is putting it nicely.) Jake took my silence to mean that I, apparently needed further convincing. "Bella, without you I don't know what I would do. You are my angel. I need you to show me how to live because if you ain't the most respectable person I know, I don't know who is. You are my guiding light, I need you. God, Bella, I need you," he said hugging me to him. "Look I was only away from you for a little while and look at the choices I made. You are just good and I need something in my life to be or I will just fall apart," he mumbled in to my hair, where his face currently resided_. I needed to tell him about Edward. That I wasn't this angel that he made me out to be. That I didn't deserve the pedestal to which he had placed me. But how could I? If he needed me to be his "guiding light" I would have to be._ I glanced over at Edward's table again to see both its occupants leaving. Edward had his hand so low on her back, to guide her from the shop; it may as well have been on her ass, which was fucking tiny. _Skinny bitch. _It was obvious they were going back to his place; well fuck him and his stupid skinny bitch. I mean yeah she was pretty if you were into that anorexic supermodel look. Which admittedly most guys are. _Shit, Jake still wants an answer._

"OK, we will give it another shot," I said without thinking. _Stupid, fucking mouth_. Always getting me in to trouble and not always the good kind.

"Oh God, you won't regret this Bella. I promise. I will make up for cheating. I will get us back to normal," those words sounded like a death sentence.

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Author's note: Thanks for reading everyone. If you have any questions comments or suggestions let me know.


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